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The Practice
Try to repeatedly tune into the interior of the people around you; "empathy moments" often take just a few seconds
To help yourself remember that empathy is not agreement or approval You can tune into someone who hurt you or is irritating; you're not waiving your rights Nor do you have to solve the other person's problem
Also know that empathy is completely natural As we evolved the brain developed three circuits (loosely defined) for empathy that simulate the actions emotions and thoughts of others For example when you experience an emotion a part of your brain called the insula lights up; remarkably when you see emotions in others some of the same neurons in your insula activate as well The result is you get a taste of what they're feeling You were born empathic
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Tune into their breathing posture gestures actions Imagine what it would feel like to move your own body in the same ways
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Stay with it Empathy is a kind of mindfulness practice sustaining attention this time to someone else's inner world
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